Tuesday, 15 January 2019

One Day at the TV Repair Shop

"Have you ever noticed that families on TV never watch television?" (Henry Youngman)

Kids today are so hard done by! They really are! Sorry, but in their quest to have the latest in cell phone technology, or perhaps that new Samsung 'The Wall' TV, they've missed out on that hi-tech fun that my generation went through, such as having to actually get off the couch and walk a whole ten feet through shag carpet just to change the TV channel.

Yes, I'm being facetious.

I remember as a kid going with my Dad to our local TV repair shop with our big bulky cabinet TV in tow. When the appliance repairman began filling out the work order, he asked, "And what's wrong with the TV?" Legitimate question.

Unfortunately for him, he had yet to have the pleasure of my father's rather twisted sense of humour, that so many others have come to enjoy, and which I and my brothers have also since inherited. My Dad answered, "It has no colour."

As the TV repairman noted the concern on the work order, I wondered how long it would take before he noticed that our old 26" Admiral black and white TV never did have colour. Dad soon let him in on the joke, however, and the real reason for our visit was duly noted.

True story. I am still laughing over that one when I think of it. 😂

In retrospect, if we had not let him in on the joke, it would have been interesting to see if we would have ended up with a colour TV after all. Probably not.

Photo Credit: David Kessler; Flicker Creative Commons

Saturday, 5 January 2019

Cockroach Milk: The New Superfood?

One of the more bizarre things I've read lately from the world of science is that the next superfood could actually be cockroach milk. Yes, you read that right; cockroach milk.

😱😱😱

As weird as all this sounds, scientists claim that there are all sorts of health benefits to cockroach milk that may be perfect for some people's diets. It is dairy-free, dense in calories and nutrients, and is a time-released food. Call me a Doubting Thomas if you will, but I'll pass. Apparently I'm getting too many calories already, and as far as time-released goes, that's easy; eat more often. Problem solved.

Yes, I'm being facetious.

I wonder what they're going to call it? Bug juice? Probably not. I suspect, however, that they may want to change the name to try and make it sound a little more palatable. Otherwise advertising might be a problem. I can just imagine a TV commercial now: "Cockroach milk; part of a nutritious and balanced breakfast!" Doesn't that just sound yummy? Somehow I doubt there will be too many people calling from the kitchen, "Who left the empty cockroach milk jug in the fridge?!" And what would one pair it with? Chocolate covered ants?

Also, just as cow's milk often has a picture of a dairy cow on the label, I wonder if the containers of cockroach milk will have a picture of little bugs on the label, maybe like the one above. This in turn begs another question: How will we know if it has gone bad? Will it start to smell good? Hmm. But then again, what do I know; many people eat bugs. Once you get over the shock of it, it might even taste kind of good … Nah!

Well there you have it; cockroach milk. Watch for it in your grocer's dairy cooler. Cheers!

Read the source article here

Photo Credit: Joachim S. Muller, Flickr Creative Commons

Retirement: Does Retiring Earlier Mean A Longer Life?

Now, here in my sixtieth year, I've been mulling over the big "R" question … Retirement. When is the right time to pull the plug? Can I afford to pull the plug? What kind of lifestyle do I really need and/or want here in my later years, and what is it going to cost to maintain that lifestyle?

The other day at work, two people shared with me that they had read an article that suggests that lifespan, and more specifically, the number of retirement years that one enjoys, may be related to the question of when one retires.

Intrigued, at home later that day I looked up the article and found it. It would seem that there was a study conducted of pensioners from several large US-based businesses that compared the retirement lifespans of people who retired at age 55 versus those who waited to retire at the more traditional age of 65. Those who retired at 55 years of age collected their pensions for an average of 25-years, while those who retired at 65 years of age only collected their pension for an average of 18-months. Wow!

"Retire at 55 and live to 80; work till you're 65 and die at 67 … Ten working years could cost you twenty years of your Retirement!"

Obviously there are always exceptions and extenuating circumstances, however, the study seems to show that the typical busy stress-filled workplace is harder on older bodies. I think there is some truth to that. Looking at my own situation, lately I am starting to find it harder and harder to get through the work week than I once did when I was younger. Sure, I can still do a quality job as well as the next person, but maybe it is time to look a little more seriously at the big "R" sooner rather than later.

Choosing to retire earlier doesn't mean the rocking chair in a nursing home; not by a long shot! Like many other retirees, I can see myself still working part time, two to three days per week, at something much more low key, less stressful, and in line with hobbies or other interests. I guess the point is, why kill yourself at the daily grind any longer than absolutely necessary? Besides, Lord willing, I'd like to enjoy a little more than only 18-months of retirement before family and friends gather for my funeral.

I guess if I have one piece of advice for younger generations, it would be this: Plan early for your big "R" while you still can. You'll blink one day and suddenly forty years ago will seem like yesterday. In the words of an elderly lady I once knew, "I ain't never seen a hearse pulling a U-Haul." Her point was, we're not taking all those trappings of the world with us anyways, so maybe we would be wise to re-evaluate the "Keeping up with the Jones'" materialism mantra in favour of an earlier and healthier retirement. Just a thought.

Read the source article here

First Photo Credit: Mike Lawrence, Flickr Creative Commons
Second Photo Credit: Marco Verch, Flickr Creative Commons