Saturday, 11 March 2017

Lessons My Grandson Taught Me; Part 4

Well here we are and I’ve now been an Opa for about five weeks. Wow! I still cannot get over the miracle of this child. If you had only known some of the past history of which I’m thinking, you’d know what I mean. But we won’t get into that here. Suffice it to say, God is good, and our family is blessed. Thank you, Jesus.

So this week there are a few lessons my grandson taught me. I had the privilege of having a nice brunch out with my grandson and his parents today. Not content to just let the little fellow sleep on indefinitely in his travel carrier, I unbuckled him and picked him up; this Opa was there for cuddles as much as he was there for the food, and perhaps more so. After all, having already had breakfast, I really didn’t need the food.

What I learned was that I am good at multitasking. I could cradle a sleeping grandson in my left arm all the way through our time in the restaurant while eating my clubhouse sandwich and fries with gravy, drink my coffee, and not even make a mess. And my grandson? Well, though I offered, his Mom said that he wasn’t allowed to have French fries and gravy yet. Oh well, dear boy, I tried.

Another lesson I learned that fell on the heels of the previous lesson in the restaurant today, was that when you’re holding a near newborn, women notice you. Now it’s a good thing that I’m not in the market, so to speak, but if I were, I think I’d be volunteering to take my grandson on public outings more often. Talk about an instant connection with members of the opposite sex! Single men, if you're looking for female companionship, take note!

However, the big lesson that stands out this week concerns something that my grandson and his Opa both seem to have in common these past few weeks; we’ve both been gaining about a pound per week. What I learned, however, was that though his weight gain is applauded, mine is not. Everyone seems to comment about how cute he looks with his little double chin and muffin-like tummy, but nobody seems to have the same appreciation for my double chin and muffin-like tummy (well actually, my tummy looks more like a whole bag full of muffins, but that’s another story). Why do you suppose that is? I guess it’s cute when he does it, but not so much when an old man does likewise.

But seriously, if I could lose weight at the same rate that my grandson gains weight, I’d be OK with that. Now all we have to do is to figure out how I can transfer some of my excess pounds to him. Who knows, if we could do that, it might even save his mom a few extra feedings. Yea, that’s it; let Opa take some of those 3:00am feedings like he did many years ago when his mother was that small. Now if only it was that easy to watch some of those numbers fall off my scale and on to his. Hmm.

Speaking of feeding, this raises another new lesson that my grandson taught me. Apparently the little guy has already figured out how to open mom’s bra. That’s a pretty impressive display of strength for a five-week old little man, or “Man-wich,” as his dad likes to call him. But now it’s time for his Opa to teach him a lesson; that trick will only last so long, dear grandson. Eventually, there comes a time when opening a female’s bra might just as easily earn you a slap. Just saying. I guess the lesson is to know that fine line between it being OK and it no longer being acceptable. Hmm.

Well there you have it; the "Lessons My Grandson Taught Me" this week. I can't wait to see what I might learn next.  

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